Not So Grounded

The Stuff We Should Talk About

A writer recently interviewed my niece, Lindsey, for a magazine feature about an inspiring young woman who transformed after a harrowing experience. (Quick recap for the uninitiated, October 2009 Lindsey – barely 20 -- and her boyfriend were robbed, and he was shot and killed as they left their house to go out to eat.  I blogged periodic updates.)

The interview was painfully magnificent; Lindsey offered details I’d never heard, and, as always, her wisdom astounded me. But afterwards she and I talked about her one glaring omission.  When asked what helped her recover she readily described support from friends and family, wonderful sessions with a therapist, stability with school and work … she even described her own fortitude.

But she didn’t mention several valuable sessions with spiritual intuitives and ongoing help from a man we can only inadequately describe as an energy healer.  Laughing she said, “I didn’t know how to bring that up.  How do you describe those things without sounding crazy?”

Yet those things probably helped her the most, even if they seemed too weird to talk about in public.  In fact, I’m finding this increasingly true for so many I know, myself included.  Incessantly worried? Perpetually sick? Cycling through the same relationship woes, the same circumstance over and over again?  I’ve seen decades of intractable, repetitive bad choices, ill health or patterns of catastrophe shift almost immediately after a session with someone skilled at shifting those energies we don’t believe exist.  While I’ve never witnessed spontaneous cures from cancer or clinical depression (although I no longer doubt they happen), I have seen crippling illnesses – mono, severe allergies, chronic fatigue, dangerous blood pressure, paralyzing anxiety, and life-stopping grief – disappear so subtly and so completely, it’s as if they never appeared in the first place. 

Lindsey has come to believe that this wacky chiropractor – this “crazy” man who taps her head, waves his hands, and talks a language that is about as comprehensible to her as ancient Greek -- is the health care provider she counts on the most.  She doesn’t know what he does, but she knows that he has been the catalyst behind her healing and her resulting transformation.  It’s like he cleared away all the debris blocking her path so that she can get on with her true life. 

I sure don’t blame her for not mentioning this in a magazine interview, given how people tear at things outside the mainstream.  But I wish she could. (And she did say yup to this blog.)

Causal Celebration

Apparently I've been really pissed off on the causal plane. 

Went to see Joanne Williams, my dear powerful energy healer, to clear up a curious fact that my financial shape stagnates despite increased earnings.  John came, too, figuring they're family finances, plus we thought a joint session would be fun.  I laid on the mattress in Joanne's Spartan living room as she pressed a sore spot on the upper left part of my chest. And Voila, she found an image of me, standing alone in the causal plane.  Really pissed.

According to Joanne, the causal plane is where manifestation begins.  Desires, intentions, ideas, passion, purpose ... they all happen elsewhere, but once coalesced, they actually leap into reality from the causal ledge.  

And evidently my leap has been stalled, and I'm none too happy about it.  I'm a Fixer, wildly enthusiastic (and pretty damn competent) at cleaning up the aftermath, helping to envision and fuel a brand new life.  But we're dallying too much, wallowing in our broken existence instead of letting it go to start fresh.  There isn't a shred of credible evidence that says oil, coal, and "natural" gas extraction and use will sustain us ad infinitem.  Yet we stay dependent, in our daily habits, our political choices, and even our anger when inevitable disasters strike.  We haven't had a "productive" war in 65 years, either (or in millenia, depending on the definition of "productive"), yet we continue to invest the majority of our financial, intellectual, cultural, and emotional capital in our war zeitgeist.  Americans have some of the worst health care outcomes and highest costs when compared to our global peers, yet we ignore simple and effective alternatives.  We enjoy less and work & dread financial peril more than almost everyone on the planet, yet collectively we don't walk away from a bankrupt system of credit, finance  "investment," employment and productivity. 

I came here to support wind farm cooperatives and wide-scale solar energy legislation.  I have been waiting eons to help build monument upon monument honoring peace, tranquility and beauty, creating eternal flames of compassion where those war statues once stood.  I was born to facilitate universal systems of universal health, uniting doctors, hospital administrators, patients, therapists, and "althernative" folks in new paradigms of well-being.  And I know with every breath that we are supposed to find joy each and every day, laughing with our kids, roaring at a soccer victory, painting a canvas, hiking a trail, curing a disease, building a home, sharing a meal ...

Instead, I was languishing on the causal plane, awaiting an unrealized reality, and furious with the delay. (We all laughed pretty hard when John suggested my angry impatience might have leaked some into this plane, too.)

So Joanne cleared away the pissed part, said Good never comes from the vibration of anger.  And reminded me that reality and action emanate from our internal selves, not necessarily from external circumstances.  I feel subtly lighter, my surprising new patience oddly blended with self-permission just to go ahead and do what I came here to do. 

Which I've decided starts with a really great party on that causal plane.

The Alternative Route

We were discussing utilization management when I started feeling wonky.  I was growing a fever and an acute need for a bed.  Or, ideally, a place to send my body into time-out until it was better behaved.  I don't think the topic made me sick, although ironic since UM (we love acronyms) is how healthcare folks decide if symptoms, diagnoses and treatments really jive.  I was still in the symptom phase, and they were getting worse. 

This has been my second Wonk in a month, which worried me, so after Lesa's Herculean nursing and 36-hours staring at HGTV in the hotel, I drove back across North Carolina and straight to Sam Williams, homeopath and functional medicine wizard.  He hooked me up to his frequency machine (which, I swear, sounds like Vegas slots), ran through a battery of tests and permutations, and smiled kindly at the end when he said, "Is there something you know you should be doing with your life, but still hesitating?  Because your body suggests it's time to get on with it."

Damn.  The flu woulda been easier.

Here's what I love (or hate - lol) about "alternative" medicine.  Things aren't parceled up like in Western medicine.  While I worried mono, Sam found existential.  He checked for parasites, bacteria and viruses (even Epstein-Barr), but found my 12th chakra gone awry instead. (Hell, I didn't even know there was a 12th chakra ...)

Fortunately, "alternative" medicine can also treat the existential, or at least ease my angst enough so I can get on with it, as Sam suggests.  Nobody kicks bacterial infections like our family docs, and Western meds and surgery have saved many a loved one's life.  But alternative medicine can treat some things that Western medicine can't.  Heal them, in fact, not just calm the symptoms and pain.

I know that's a leap.  But conventional and alternative are really really different.  Different enough they require radically different questions, assumptions and mind-sets.  Even conversation is tough.  It's akin to translation -- Sanskrit and Swahili are both languages, but it's sure hard to talk when the characters remain foreign.  Oversimplification:  Western sees mechanistic precision, exquisite attention to each detailed part; bacteria invade and must be eradicated for normal functioning to resume. Alternative sees wholeness, a tapestry of unfathomable interconnections; a sentry got distracted, caused by one of a zillion possible reasons (a passing fantasy, partied too late last night, been pissed off at the boss for 16 years ...) allowing the virus to sneak through that gaping hole in the wall.  So let's find the unique thing to close the hole, get rid of the virus and help the sentry heal what ails him (endless possible treatments for endless possible scenarios).

A week into Sam's treatment last fall, Maddy's acute mono ceased; within a month she said she felt better than she had in a year; within 3 months she felt better than she ever remembered.  Bonnie Walker's acupuncture once stopped a full-blown migraine instantly; a few more treatments and they never returned.  My chronically high cortisol and that intense chest-clench I've been ignoring for months?  My weird, sudden muscle spasms and aches and allergies? John's lingering symptoms from 40-year old knock-outs to the head?  All been healed by "alternatives."  (I have a fabulous list of folks -- I'm happy to share.)

So Friday afternoon Sam gave me half a dozen little containers of homeopathics to take 3 times a day.  A few treat predictable things: flu, fever, stomachache.  But the flower essences are my favorites:  filaree to regain a cosmic perspective on mundane worries; golden yarrow to find comfort and protection in an expanded, open life; and mimulus to help my soul find the strength and purpose of my higher self.

I spent Saturday in bed, Sunday finished some chores, today I'm physically back to normal.  Now it's on to "getting on with it," whatever "it" might be.  I keep tracing back to Wednesday's utilization management discussion, those links between symptoms, diagnoses and treatment.  We need to broaden them somehow, expand them, create something that bellows, "Ya know - we need all the types of medicines we can get!"  I suspect there's an "it" in there.

Chiropractor Meleah Mauldin, another woman from the Tuesday night adventure shared this with us all.  It's taken from Daily Om which offers all kinds of cool stuff, including a daily email subscription.   

July 22, 2008
Tending Your Own Energy Field
Fill Yourself from the Inside Out
Life presents us with many opportunities to gain mastery in tending our own energy fields. At times we may want to protect ourselves by using energy shields of color, light or angelic presence. Or in order to become more grounded, we may run energy down through our feet or first chakra, rooting ourselves to the earth. Sometimes it's appropriate to play openly with others in an expansive, flowing state; and at other times, we may want to limit our availability to a chosen few. In certain public environments such as graduation ceremonies, work conventions, or even weddings, it may be important to remain open-hearted and able to connect, while still preventing our individual systems from depletion or overwhelm. In these situations, rather than putting a barrier between ourselves and the world around us, we can fill our energy fields from the inside out. In doing this, we become so filled with our own personal energy that no room is left for outside influences or discordant energy to enter in and affect us.

When you need to connect with people on a one-to-one basis, separate from the bustling environment around you, here is a visualization technique you might try. You can start in the morning and repeat any time as needed. Begin by taking a few moments to breathe deeply and relax. When you are calm and present, envision a ball of light in your solar plexus area just above your belly button. Allow it to build there, growing stronger and stronger. Eventually, allow the light to expand throughout the rest of your body until it fills your entire physical and energetic field.

By filling yourself with your own energy in this way, you become fortified with your own power. You retain access to all of your intuitive and mental abilities. And, you are able to act from a loving space in the midst of any situation.

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