Goodbye - Hello

Eight Hours Later ...

We finally convened last Saturday to Do This Thing.  Maddy, Laurie, Debbie, and I -- each with our own laptop -- lined up along Debbie's kitchen counter.  Maddy filled in Americorps and Common applications, Debbie and I divided & conquered an bleery-eyed lists of schools, Laurie practiced Mavis Beacon's "learn to type" so every few minutes would lament "Damn, I sunk another plane!"  

Radford's art courses were amazing, 'till we realized some of the stellar faculty hadn't actually been there in years ... Colorado College first did it's block schedule so faculty and students could spend more time questioning the Viet Nam war (learned this from a friend who taught there -- said she loved it and they were the only students ever who read everything assigned) ... no way will Maddy get accepted to UCSB, it's all by the highest numbers imaginable ... the Sweet Briar homepage is so pink & green I suspect the graduates wear bows instead of tassels ... Middlebury, Sarah Lawrence, Smith, Swathmore Amherst describe dance as nectar sweet for the gods ... U Oregon, U Colorado, UNC Greensboro more government-issue but still rich ... North Carolina is the best in-state deal for the buck I've found, but Maddy's best fit (Appalachian State) would keep her in the hometown she's desperate to leave.

Ugh.  

We refrained from drinking, although not sure why. I did a spreadsheet, which dulled my headache some (I love spreadsheets), and we stumbled home 8 hours later. Both Debbie and I dreamt of gruesome disasters and disorganized chaos the whole following night.

Getting More Serious

Finally saw my kid yesterday.  She's been at her Dad's all week, and between her dance & my work we've missed each other after school.  (Her Dad lives nearby, and -- as anyone who knows me would expect --  we've never had a schedule.  We all get along great, so we wing it based on every-changing activities.  At 17, Maddy comes and goes between homes as she chooses.)  She stopped by my office, ostensibly to work on college applications, but after we caught up, she fell asleep.  (The mono is improving dramatically, but the rainy day & cozy couch were too inviting.)

We realized we're talking about college plans a lot.  Seemingly all the time.  Weighing incessantly the options -- big school, small school; close to home or New England or those places where her favorite bands are currently touring (suggesting a Cool factor, not necessarily to turn groupie, although reminiscing about the 60's & 70's and the current delightful lives of my once-groupie friends, perhaps that's not a bad option?) (The gigs are in California and Washington, by the way.)  

All this talk is becoming a bit repetitive and annoying, particularly since we don't seem to resolve anything.  

So our best friends & we will dedicate Sunday to Concrete Action.  Maddy & Laurie will complete applications while Debbie & I sort through FAFSA and scholarship guides.  We will schedule more visits and any required auditions and portfolio reviews (Laurie is an amazing artist).  I'm thinking we'll also need to bake chocolate chip cookies, some comfort sustenance through all that tactical engagement.

Maddy has banned all college-related conversations until then.

Fortunately Debbie defied the ban to reminded me today's the deadline to pay for the October 24 ACT so my wallet & I must sign off. 

"I'm going to write a blog about your last year at home, the whole transition thing ... from high school to college, childhood to independence, full-time mom to empty nest ... how it feels for you and for me."

"Okay, whatever."